Perspective on the Gift of Good Health

Today is the last day of Junior Kindergarten. My sweet girl is now moving on to Senior Kindergarten, where she will be among the older children in a blended class rather than in the younger group. She will learn to spell words and to read. With today's substantial emphasis on literacy in the school system, a child's ability to read and write is a milestone akin to a baby's first steps.

Today, the day Aquinnah would finish off her junior kindergarten year, would be a much more 'independent' day for her. Whether it was a good night's sleep, her increasing independence and self-sufficiency, or just an eagerness to participate more in the - sometimes feared and tenuous - morning routine, she made the morning her own. She 'owned' it.

I worked and relaxed a bit last night, so today's lunch for my junior kindergartner was not prepared! This has often created a little kerfuffle in the morning because making lunch cuts into every other part of getting ready in the morning, including my omelet making time. Not today!

While my daughter is able to get herself dressed, brush her teeth and wash her face on her own, she most often needs a little cheering on, with a little bit of diretiveness thrown in on particularly tough mornings. As I was making the omelet with Nathaniel, I asked her to get herself dressed and groomed - and she did! No hesitation, no harangue, no hassle.

When she came downstairs I was in the midst of eating my breakfast and assembling her lunch when she said, "I'll make my lunch today Mommy!" And she did! She got the snacks out and the sandwich "parts" out. I helped her get the sandwich parts into the croissant and off she went to wash her strawberries and put them in a reusable container.

She taught herself some math as she went through four containers to get the right one that all her strawberries fit into - without making jam of them - and that also fit into her lunch box. I cheered her on as I ate my breakfast watching her try one container, identify why it did not work and search for another one that would meet all the "requirements".

The beauty of this morning is that I was relaxed and she was relaxed. With a recent health scare, I've had the ominous gift of being jolted into perspective. While these 'small' bumps along the way - not enough time to make lunch, whining about combing hair, not getting work done the previous night - can sometimes escalate into the proverbial straw that invites conflict, perspective on the gift of good health stops that spinning to open the door to appreciation and a healthy mindset.

Domestic Diva

Today was a writing day. I diligently worked all day, writing and writing. I didn't do housework because that is distracting...I only loaded and unloaded laundry twice.

Later in the day I took the time to iron. Yes, I said iron. What is ironing, some - as I would have - might say? It's that "archaic" art of pressing your clothes with a hot iron. I can't say I've done that recently, but I must admit, it gave me a sense of peace and accomplishment.

That is odd, I agree. Ironing is often relegated to other tasks like peeling potatoes or scrubbing the toilet bowl. My mother used to iron for hours; handkerchiefs, shirts, handkerchiefs and more shirts. She always looked so peaceful. Today, I got a glimpse of why.

I had been writing for a good part of the day and took out about 20 minutes after my "work shift" to iron some clothes. I wasn't in a rush - I wasn't madly trying to iron that dress before rushing out the door. I was just taking my time, ironing every part of each piece of clothing carefully and slowly. Well, it felt like gardening or watering the garden. I was doing something I enjoyed - I don't iron often; it may have been a different experience if this was a daily "chore" - and something that was slow, peaceful and had a concrete finished product that I could say, "Hey, I did that!"

In a curious way, reverting "back" to a regular chore that is not in my day to day experience gave me a sense of accomplishment and calm. So, there you have it. Ironing - or another secret calming force - may be waiting for you around the corner.

Nanny Negotiations at the Accessories Aisle

I went to the proverbial suburb "mall" yesterday to return an item in a popular clothing/accessories store. It all happened between the earrings and sunglasses: the nanny deal.

I - along with several other women with and without children - was browsing when I heard a woman talking a little loudly saying, "Well, I used to have a nanny, but they're hard to keep. Do you know anyone?" She was talking to a nanny who was there with her charge; a child about as happy to be at a mall as any other small child!

The woman and the nanny went on to discuss business; where nannies can be hired; how to retain a nanny; the importance of a nanny for a busy working mother who has to leave the house early and arrives home late every evening; and the key question, "Maybe I could hire you, or a nanny like you?"

As many parents know, childcare is rarely an easy find. Returning to work after a maternity leave and leaving your child in someone else's hands without looking back is even more rare. I remember talking to a neighbour about this when I was planning to return to work after my first maternity leave when she smiled and said, "The good news, is that there are lots of caring and loving people out there who love taking care of children." And - there are!

Wherever you find your caregiver, your comfort level is often the tell-tale sign that it's the "right" caregiver. Whether you find your caregiver through a friend, from the newspaper, a posting in your community, between the tomatoes and corn or sunglasses and earrings, a website or after months of searching all possibilities, these are good spots for a busy working mother - maybe on her lunch break - to get information and maybe, just maybe find that special someone.

A Deep Cut

Today started innocently enough, after a restful (albeit short) sleep. I dropped off my daughter at school, son at childcare and returned to my office to get work done! Everything was going well...phone calls made, documents being written and reviewed, email messages being responded.

I was preparing to leave for a meeting when the phone rang and I saw my daughter's school number flash on the caller ID. My heart skipped a beat and I picked up the phone to hear the secretary at her school leaving a message that she needed to speak to me pronto and she would be calling my cell phone - and keep calling me until she spoke to me. A second later my cell phone rang and there she was again. Aquinnah had fallen while riding a bike and cut herself. "The cut looks deep so her teacher thought she might need stitches".

I had received calls from many day care providers, Aquinnah's school and my husband when I was not home and I had learned not to panic because it was never about an injury. I unlearned that quickly enough - for a split second - when I was talking to the secretary today.

I tried not to rush madly...but I didn't crawl to her school either! The cut was deep. I didn't want to wait at a walk-in clinic to be told to take her to the hospital for stitches so...off to the hospital we went...Anyone who has had to sit in Emerg knows that I don't have to describe the wait, the angst and the constant reassurance to a little soul who is frightened and brave all at once.

After some crying, colouring, cuddling and comforting, we got in to see the doctor, who thankfully said she would not need stitches! As we were leaving, my sweet girl burst into tears saying, "But my boo boo isn't gone. He didn't make it go away. I don't like this place!"

It's a sad reality that these (and all other varieties of) "boo boos" take time to heal and that, as we age, we learn to manage or put up with the process of healing superficial and deep wounds.

I was able to pick up my son from daycare before they closed, with my dear friend on stand-by should I need her to get him.

The day closed with Aquinnah coming to me with a small construction paper bear with a big orange heart at the centre that she had made in school recently. "This is for you mommy for taking care of me today. I love you."

Moonlight Helper

I know many moms who work by the light of the moon, when the house is quiet and the children are asleep! I suppose you would call this the "third shift", or the "split shift" if you worked earlier in the day. While I make an effort not to work every night, you will find my office light on - on occasion ?! - after eight. (I think this is where After Eight's came from - this minty creamy chocolate was developed especially for those who work after eight as motivation to keep on keeping on!)

So, there I was, working when I heard my son call out. I went to see what the problem was and there he was, sleepy eyed sitting up in bed crying. He told me he had peed the bed, to which I responded that he was wearing a diaper so it was quite alright. But no, somehow, the diaper was soaked through along with his pyjamas and bedsheets.

We've had a run of wet bedsheets this week, so I set about my routine to clean him up and change his bed. He stood in his dimly lit bedroom watching me and said, "You're a good helper mommy!" I stopped tucking the fitted sheet, looked at him and said, "Pardon me?" "You're a wery good helper mommy!" I smiled and said, "Thank you." "You're welcome. And I'm a wery good watcher." I said, "Yes, Nathaniel, you are a very good watcher."

I tucked him in as he murmured, "All comfy cozy again." It's these "interruptions" that are priceless and fill you with that I-can't-believe-how-fortunate-I-am-feeling.

Off I go now, to my dark chocolate and my own comfy cozy zone.

An Enchanted Workspace

There's a king and queen minibook, drawn by me and coloured by my daughter sitting on my docking station and a card that says, "thinking of you Mommy", signed in my daughter's junior kindergarten printing. Strawberry shortcake, coloured in vibrant red, purple, yellow and blue is looking over my shoulder. My two children walk and crawl on a sandy Wasaga beach in a photo next to my computer monitor.

These are the makings of an enchanted workspace.

The card that she wrote for me accompanied flowers that she and her daddy got for me on International Woman's Day in March.

I have a sleek silver model sports car on my shelf, which my daughter and I assembled, and my son loves to play with when he is given the opportunity. He always returns it, making sure it gets placed in its special 'parking spot', until the next time he decides to take it out for a drive.

While my children are 'not allowed' in my office, from time to time, I am pleasantly surprised by my daughter's decorating my office in her art work and expressions of love. The beauty of it is that they are able to decorate my workspace and I am lucky enough to be surprised by it. The icing on the cake? They are old enough to respect the space.

All of these things remind me of how blessed I am to have my family around me, rooting for me and showering me with gifts from their loving hearts and minds.

A Crayon Chute, An Allen Key and a Desk

That's what you get when you add up a desk-in-a-box, a helpful hubby, an artistic 4-1/2 year old girl and an imaginative 2-1/2 year old boy!

We had received my new desk a few days ago, but hadn't had the time to assemble it. Today was the day when the desk-in-a-box became my new found space for my work! My husband and I started assembling the desk when both children were "napping". No sooner had we started to open the box, when my daughter arrived at the door, all smiles, ready to participate.

She found a long piece of cardboard taped together as a long hallow tube. This became her telescope, which she carefully coloured in every colour of the rainbow. My husband and I tried to work fast to assemble the desk, but you know how it goes when you are trying to figure out which way is "up" and where the front is - and where, oh, where did that tiny little Allen key go!

Not long after our daughter had completed her telescope, my son woke up and joined us in the project. He did, after all, want to help. He too found a "telescope", but preferred to launch crayons through his sister's telescope to see how well he could aim them from where he was sitting to the floor. (Those telescopes also make good clubs, as my two children discovered!)

All, in all, each of us managed to create something and were proud of our creations. Not to mention the added bonus of extra work space for this busy mom!